I didn't vote for the guy and he won. The cards dealt a band hand, shit happens like that sometimes, I folded.
Since election night I've purposely avoided any political news, any presidential press conference, and presidential tweet storms.
I admit it, I can't take it.
He won, ok, I get it, but I CAN'T TAKE IT.
I'd like to sit in a dark room with a wool cloak and act all Nostrodamus but I knew this was going to spawn to this level of ugliness. You are what you eat. We ate a big juicy fat cheeseburger for president and now we have to sit and try to not act full and nibble on fries.
Hey America, you fat morherfucker. Stop eating.
Thanks to every looping breaking news that's NOT breaking news on CNN, I've woken up to new tweets about confederate statues, passive yet aggressive tiki torch holders, and the president arguing with the press when he should be reading a 6th grade American history textbook.
I'm now that American who travels to another country and tries to not talk about America. Like "I don't know what's wrong with that motherfucker". We are the family at the reunion trying to explain our cousin's developmental delay to non family guests. We are that guy in the backseat who slumps low as possible when your friends act ignorant in public.
My prediction: 2 years tops.
Afterward a book and docu with some brash title like "America Is My Baby Momma" or "Trump: How He Fooled A Country Into Anal".